Since it’s the week of Pesach, life at the ulpan has slowed to a subtle crawl. Many of the students are away celebrating with friends and family either somewhere in Israel, or for the Europeans, London, Paris, Italy, and Berlin. I celebrated Pesach Seder with this nice British family who I met through friends. During these last few weeks, I have been attempting to identity with the upcoming holiday. Truth be told, I didn’t have to search too far. I haven’t felt this free in such a long time. Grant it, it’s rather liberating living one day at a time and studying Hebrew. The hardest decision is where to eat for lunch. The above mention just means I’m lazy and without problems; it doesn’t mean I’m truly free, which is the real meaning of Pesach; the liberation of Egyptian slavery for G-d’s chosen few, the Jews. I am free this year because I don’t have to explain my Judaism to anyone. Last year I had to beg my boss for the 1st 2 days of Passover off. Even though I had plenty of vacation time, I was almost forced to work the 1st two days of chag. It became quickly apparent that I had no future with that company and my patience for life outside of Israel had worn very thin. I will never again feel like an outside when I walk down the street with a kippah (yarmulke) on the top of my head. Issues like these don’t exist in a free Jewish state like Israel, but then again Israel exists because we will never allow the world to turn its back on the Jewish people, NEVER AGAIN. I am blessed to be living in Jerusalem where I can explore Judaism freely with other young Jews my own age.
Over the last few days, I’ve been engaged in more raw, real, intimate conversations with the few students remaining her at Ulpan. In trying to put my finger on the international pulse of Etzion, I have realized some stark, harsh realities about how the world views the United States and its citizens. People whole heartedly acknowledge the amazing gifts the United States have given the World: Madonna, loads of cash in the form of strings attached grants, Levi jeans, and Coca-Cola. However our recent follies in Iraq, the falling dollar, and the image of the obese, lazy, tv dinner eating American trumps all the medical, technological, educational, and theatrical advancements we have produced since our empirical rise shortly after World War II. In talking to some friends from France, Argentina, and Russia, the World really despises us. There is a lot of merit in their blunt, brutally honest criticism of my native land. Our economy is in the middle of a downward, adjustable mortgage interest rate spiral, the dollar is weak, our army is mired in Iraq, and Iran is thumbing its nuclear nose at us. I couldn’t argue with any of these facts, even though it kills me to admit fault and imperfection, but doesn’t every country have issues? We have done so much for the World, probably as much as the Roman Empire had done to the known world during the height of Pax Romana. I shouldn’t have to remind my American readers, but for those few ignorant Europeans who fail to remember a world before the Euro: we liberated Europe no more than 63 years ago, spent countless millions of dollars in rebuilding her, and then spent the next 50 years and countless billions of dollars defending Europe from Soviet aggression. So many medical advancements and scientific research have been accomplished by the United States. We created: the internet, Hollywood (long before WWII), and the first modern democracy/republic. I feel as though much of world not only hopes for the failure of America, each individual country is licking their chops to be the next global super power. The world has benefited so much from our creation, invention, and ideas. Can someone show us a little fuckin gratitude??
I’m not even talking about the Arab world, which despite their oil, I couldn’t give a shit about. I’m talking about Central & Southern America, Europe, and Asia, which for years loved American dollars, the free market trade, and U.S./NATO protection against countless security threats. I have come to the conclusion that the world is a whore who will screw your brains out for a cost, and then screw you over the first chance something better comes around. I don’t know if America’s dominance has climaxed, but let this be a warning to those jealous, brazen new kids on the block: Brazil, China, India, and the E.U: what comes around goes around, and you too will be loved and then left.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Duck and Cover
Shalom Kulom,
All is well here live from Jerusalem.
Lately, I have been finding myself connecting to the American, British, and larger Anglo-speaking community in Israel and greater Jerusalem. Thanks to my friend Richard, from Manchester/London, I have been introduced to many, new lovely English speaking Israelis, most olim chadashim. It's a breath of fresh air to be surrounded by native English speakers many of whom are highly observant. Over the last few Shabbatot, I haven’t had to explain my observant lifestyle nor have I had to explain, interpret, or translate my thoughts and ideas into Hebrew. It’s a pleasant distraction from my non-stop Hebrew speaking, learning environment.
As previously noted, many of my new acquaintances are religious which provide a nice, different reassuring atmosphere. With all due respect, this is Israel and Jerusalem of all places, where it seems most Jews are dati (observant) to some extent. However, at Ulpan Etzion, that’s just simply not that case. I have had to explain, defend, or fight for my religion at every junction so far. I thought living here would finally offer me a chance to be among Jews who understood Judaism. Instead of being comfortable on Shabbos, I am made to feel like the outsider. I have consistently met road blocks in regards to people :watching the football match on tv during Shabbat dinner, listening to loud music, running computers, playing guitars and pianos in public areas such as the Heder Ochal (dinning room area), and people who fail to acknowledge the sanctity of Kiddish by refusing to stand and wait for us to eat. I am having nightmare like visions of trying to keep my room and general living quarters kosher for Peasch, which require even stricter standards during the 7 or 8 day upcoming holiday.
Now most would say, “David it’s unfair, unreasonable, and borderline offensive to expect others to conform to your religious standards. Israel is a democracy and religion is a free choice.” I couldn’t agree more with those statements. I wasn’t always shomer Shabbat. There was a very distinct time a few years ago when I would drive on Shabbat, turn lights on, and watch the Sox game on Friday nights.
However, I always respected and even elevated my personal religious behavior around those more observant so as to not offend anyone. Is it absurd to expect the same in Jerusalem of all places? I can’t nor would want to control what others do in the privacy of their own rooms, but there must be a code of conduct in public ulpan areas. I beg those around, out of common respect not for me but for themselves and their own Jewish history, to be more thoughtful before they answer a cell phone, play their trumpet, or watch Eyes Wide Shut in common areas during Shabbos.
In other news, I spent last Shabbat, compared to most of my other ones, on a beautiful religious kibbutz up north in Bet Shean. I couldn’t get over just how peaceful life seemed for the members. The kibbutz was filled with some of the most gorgeous vegetation, colorful tress and plants I had never seen before. I could see myself retiring or even raising a family on one of these kibbutzes. Families feel comfortable to allow their children to play outside in the countryside, leave their doors open on Shabbat so neighbors can visit, and leave the windows unlocked at nights. Kibbutzism are no longer a hippy commune-fest but rather a serious adventure in free capitalism enterprise with various precise industries. If you're interested in learning more about the kibbutz movement, which many believe helped build Israel up from the ground during the early days of the county between 1880-1930; feel free to visit the wikipedia link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kibbutz
As previously mentioned, this Saturday at sundown marks the beginning of Pesach or Passover, the Jewish holiday commemorateing the Israelite’s mass exodus from the Egyptian slavery into our desert freedom. I have already purchased my kosher for Passover food/health supplies, which were so much easier this year, and I will begin cleaning my room in search of chametz (forbidden bread products) tomorrow. For more information on Passover/Pesach, please feel free to visit the wikipedia site for holiday details : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Passover. With the next two weeks off from school, I hope to study more, see a few movies, catch up on my non-Hebrew reading, and visit some museums. More details to follow as the holiday comes closer!
Last week, in preparation for any potential national emergency, we had an air raid drill. Yes, you read my words correctly. We had a fuckin air raid! For some of my older readers, you may or may not remember the good old duck and cover air raid drills under your school desk in the 1950's and 1960's. Apparently, this was the only civil deterrence we had against Soviets if they every decided to drop “the big one” on the U.S. We had an army spokeswoman inform us what to do in case of an “Earthquake,” but we all knew what they meant: Syrian and Iranian missile attacks which may or may not include chemical, nuclear, or biological warfare. Don’t worry; the government hopes to disperse gas masks to the entire civilian population by 2010. Welcome to Israel!
Chag Samech everyone,
David
All is well here live from Jerusalem.
Lately, I have been finding myself connecting to the American, British, and larger Anglo-speaking community in Israel and greater Jerusalem. Thanks to my friend Richard, from Manchester/London, I have been introduced to many, new lovely English speaking Israelis, most olim chadashim. It's a breath of fresh air to be surrounded by native English speakers many of whom are highly observant. Over the last few Shabbatot, I haven’t had to explain my observant lifestyle nor have I had to explain, interpret, or translate my thoughts and ideas into Hebrew. It’s a pleasant distraction from my non-stop Hebrew speaking, learning environment.
As previously noted, many of my new acquaintances are religious which provide a nice, different reassuring atmosphere. With all due respect, this is Israel and Jerusalem of all places, where it seems most Jews are dati (observant) to some extent. However, at Ulpan Etzion, that’s just simply not that case. I have had to explain, defend, or fight for my religion at every junction so far. I thought living here would finally offer me a chance to be among Jews who understood Judaism. Instead of being comfortable on Shabbos, I am made to feel like the outsider. I have consistently met road blocks in regards to people :watching the football match on tv during Shabbat dinner, listening to loud music, running computers, playing guitars and pianos in public areas such as the Heder Ochal (dinning room area), and people who fail to acknowledge the sanctity of Kiddish by refusing to stand and wait for us to eat. I am having nightmare like visions of trying to keep my room and general living quarters kosher for Peasch, which require even stricter standards during the 7 or 8 day upcoming holiday.
Now most would say, “David it’s unfair, unreasonable, and borderline offensive to expect others to conform to your religious standards. Israel is a democracy and religion is a free choice.” I couldn’t agree more with those statements. I wasn’t always shomer Shabbat. There was a very distinct time a few years ago when I would drive on Shabbat, turn lights on, and watch the Sox game on Friday nights.
However, I always respected and even elevated my personal religious behavior around those more observant so as to not offend anyone. Is it absurd to expect the same in Jerusalem of all places? I can’t nor would want to control what others do in the privacy of their own rooms, but there must be a code of conduct in public ulpan areas. I beg those around, out of common respect not for me but for themselves and their own Jewish history, to be more thoughtful before they answer a cell phone, play their trumpet, or watch Eyes Wide Shut in common areas during Shabbos.
In other news, I spent last Shabbat, compared to most of my other ones, on a beautiful religious kibbutz up north in Bet Shean. I couldn’t get over just how peaceful life seemed for the members. The kibbutz was filled with some of the most gorgeous vegetation, colorful tress and plants I had never seen before. I could see myself retiring or even raising a family on one of these kibbutzes. Families feel comfortable to allow their children to play outside in the countryside, leave their doors open on Shabbat so neighbors can visit, and leave the windows unlocked at nights. Kibbutzism are no longer a hippy commune-fest but rather a serious adventure in free capitalism enterprise with various precise industries. If you're interested in learning more about the kibbutz movement, which many believe helped build Israel up from the ground during the early days of the county between 1880-1930; feel free to visit the wikipedia link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kibbutz
As previously mentioned, this Saturday at sundown marks the beginning of Pesach or Passover, the Jewish holiday commemorateing the Israelite’s mass exodus from the Egyptian slavery into our desert freedom. I have already purchased my kosher for Passover food/health supplies, which were so much easier this year, and I will begin cleaning my room in search of chametz (forbidden bread products) tomorrow. For more information on Passover/Pesach, please feel free to visit the wikipedia site for holiday details : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Passover. With the next two weeks off from school, I hope to study more, see a few movies, catch up on my non-Hebrew reading, and visit some museums. More details to follow as the holiday comes closer!
Last week, in preparation for any potential national emergency, we had an air raid drill. Yes, you read my words correctly. We had a fuckin air raid! For some of my older readers, you may or may not remember the good old duck and cover air raid drills under your school desk in the 1950's and 1960's. Apparently, this was the only civil deterrence we had against Soviets if they every decided to drop “the big one” on the U.S. We had an army spokeswoman inform us what to do in case of an “Earthquake,” but we all knew what they meant: Syrian and Iranian missile attacks which may or may not include chemical, nuclear, or biological warfare. Don’t worry; the government hopes to disperse gas masks to the entire civilian population by 2010. Welcome to Israel!
Chag Samech everyone,
David
Sunday, March 23, 2008
License to Drive and Ladies Night!
Shalom in the home!
Well, its' been far too long since I've last written to everyone. It’s time for a general recap.
Last week, while most of my fellow students were on an organized tiyul (trip) to the Negev (desert) in the south, I rented a car and drove up north to Tzfat and Tiberais for Shabbat. It was a very restful, relaxing 2 days. After Shabbat was over, I drove south on route 90 (which reminded me of the good, old, unreliable Mass turnpike) from the beautiful spiritual Golan region towards Eliat. Along the way, I cut through the small, Arab Israeli villages in the West Bank. It was a little nerve-racking to see signs for Ramallah and Jericho, but the highways are under Israeli control and army protection. You can tell the difference between Israeli cars and Palestinian cars by the color of the license plats, and I saw many yellow Israeli I.D. plates as well as the green Palestinian Arab ones. As I drove south, I could see the Dead Sea, the lowest point in the world, all along the left-hand side of my car. I've been blessed to witness many man-made and G-d made wonders throughout the world during my young life, but the desert sunset overlooking the Dead Sea adjacent to the Judean Hills was among some of the most amazing scenery I've ever encountered. After almost 3 months, I really missed driving on my own. Maneuvering around a crowded city like Jerusalem wasn’t easy, but the lonely one line road to Eliat was dangerous (very curvy and unpredictable) but not heavily traveled. The 6 hour drive was therapeutic and quiet. At the end of my journey, I had literally driven from the northern border to the southern border. I felt like Corey Haim and Corey Feldmen in License to Drive.
Once in Eliat, I met up with some British friends. We sat by the beach (Red Sea), soaked in the sun (received a little burn), swam a little, visited the aquarium, ate really well at a sushi restaurant and a delicious steak house (all kosher), and even drove to the Jordian and Egyptian borders. At night, I could see the coastal lights of Egypt, Jordan, Israel, and even Saudi Arabia off in the distance. The weather was hot (even the nights) but the water was still a little on the cool side. Eliat is very much a resort town, where the Israeli gov't has coincidently decided to void all sales taxes within the city. In the summer, it's hotter than Miami and filled with tourists but in the winter, it's a pleasant weekend get away for many European visitors.
This week was more or less a half week, with the trip and up-coming Purim festival http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purim. Please feel free to visit the linked website to learn more about Purim, the celebrations, and miracle of Jewish survival. At Ulpan Etzion, we had our own pre-Purim party where I went all out. I dressed in drag, as Ms. Marilyn Monroe, and I invite everyone to see the pictures of me at my facebook profile at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=506951945 . Just click on photos of me, and you'll have a guaranteed good laugh. Purim is a three day holiday this year, with Shabbat mixed in the middle.
For Shabbos, two of my ulpan friends, Sam from Boston and Richard from London, walked to the Western Wall in the Old city and enjoyed a really crazy, wild prayer service with Hasidic Yeshiva students. We saw thousands of men, dressed up in dark, black, suits dancing and screaming in prayer to the Almighty, as sweat pours off their body in 80 degree temperatures. I had a sports jacket on and felt rather warm. Afterwards, we were invited to the most amazing Shabbos meal at this random family's house in the German Colony. Basically, since the Western Wall is the holies site in Judaism, Jews from all over the World come to pray here on Shabbat. Many of us are single or from out of town with no place to eat. This real mensche named Jeff Sidel always finds a place for me, and whoever else needs a dinner, after services. He's been doing this wonderful act of kindness now for many years. Everyone knows about him and his real generous work. We walked for about 30 minutes but were properly rewarded when we reached the family's home. None of us knew the family, but they turned out to have the most delicious Shabbos meal, with really moist salmon, delicious wine, spicy Chinese style chicken, and so many side dishes. For dessert, we were treated to 18 year old Scotch and yummy cakes over games of chess, poker, while schmoozing with other various guests. We met some really friendly and well connected people from all over J'lem and Israel that night. Needless to say, the neighborhood was very posh. I was very impressed and very much appreciative to this American-Israeli family who opened up their home to me and several other strangers.
Well, I now have the travel bug and party vibe, but it's back to studying. We have a lot of hard work ahead of exams before Peasch (Passover holiday in 3 more weeks), and I feel my Hebrew progressing. There are certain things I feel comfortable speaking about in Hebrew. Sometimes I can hold an entire 20 minutes conversation with a few mistakes, while other times I need to ask for help or have a hard time finding the right words. On Shabbos afternoon, a few of us were invited to a mutual friend's flat for lunch. Many of the guests were Israeli so I was forced to talk (or try at least) to chat in Hebrew. The more I force myself and make mistakes, the more comfortable I become and the more I learn through social situations. I learn the material in class, try it out on the streets, make mistakes, and eventually mix the right words/phrases and grammar in through social interactions with Israelis.
Well I'd like to wish Chag Samech to all my Jewish friends and a Happy Easter to all my Christian friends back home. Friday was Good Friday, and during Shabbat services at the Kotel (Western Wall), thousands of Christian Pilgrims were in town to walk down Via Dolorosa to re-enact the Stations of the Cross. It's nice to see all three religions acting well towards each other for a change. It's been calm around here lately; I hope is stays that way.
So, please keep me informed of what's going on in all of your lives! I want to know who's pregnant, engaged, getting a divorce, G-d forbid dead, graduating, or enjoying a vacation/ mile-stone in their life. JUST BECAUSE I'M A STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND DOESN'T MEAN MY LOYAL FRIENDS, FAMILY, AND SEEDY ONLINE READERS HAVE TO BE. Please feel free to email me at Mountdew2891@aol.com
L'hitarot,
David
Well, its' been far too long since I've last written to everyone. It’s time for a general recap.
Last week, while most of my fellow students were on an organized tiyul (trip) to the Negev (desert) in the south, I rented a car and drove up north to Tzfat and Tiberais for Shabbat. It was a very restful, relaxing 2 days. After Shabbat was over, I drove south on route 90 (which reminded me of the good, old, unreliable Mass turnpike) from the beautiful spiritual Golan region towards Eliat. Along the way, I cut through the small, Arab Israeli villages in the West Bank. It was a little nerve-racking to see signs for Ramallah and Jericho, but the highways are under Israeli control and army protection. You can tell the difference between Israeli cars and Palestinian cars by the color of the license plats, and I saw many yellow Israeli I.D. plates as well as the green Palestinian Arab ones. As I drove south, I could see the Dead Sea, the lowest point in the world, all along the left-hand side of my car. I've been blessed to witness many man-made and G-d made wonders throughout the world during my young life, but the desert sunset overlooking the Dead Sea adjacent to the Judean Hills was among some of the most amazing scenery I've ever encountered. After almost 3 months, I really missed driving on my own. Maneuvering around a crowded city like Jerusalem wasn’t easy, but the lonely one line road to Eliat was dangerous (very curvy and unpredictable) but not heavily traveled. The 6 hour drive was therapeutic and quiet. At the end of my journey, I had literally driven from the northern border to the southern border. I felt like Corey Haim and Corey Feldmen in License to Drive.
Once in Eliat, I met up with some British friends. We sat by the beach (Red Sea), soaked in the sun (received a little burn), swam a little, visited the aquarium, ate really well at a sushi restaurant and a delicious steak house (all kosher), and even drove to the Jordian and Egyptian borders. At night, I could see the coastal lights of Egypt, Jordan, Israel, and even Saudi Arabia off in the distance. The weather was hot (even the nights) but the water was still a little on the cool side. Eliat is very much a resort town, where the Israeli gov't has coincidently decided to void all sales taxes within the city. In the summer, it's hotter than Miami and filled with tourists but in the winter, it's a pleasant weekend get away for many European visitors.
This week was more or less a half week, with the trip and up-coming Purim festival http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purim. Please feel free to visit the linked website to learn more about Purim, the celebrations, and miracle of Jewish survival. At Ulpan Etzion, we had our own pre-Purim party where I went all out. I dressed in drag, as Ms. Marilyn Monroe, and I invite everyone to see the pictures of me at my facebook profile at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=506951945 . Just click on photos of me, and you'll have a guaranteed good laugh. Purim is a three day holiday this year, with Shabbat mixed in the middle.
For Shabbos, two of my ulpan friends, Sam from Boston and Richard from London, walked to the Western Wall in the Old city and enjoyed a really crazy, wild prayer service with Hasidic Yeshiva students. We saw thousands of men, dressed up in dark, black, suits dancing and screaming in prayer to the Almighty, as sweat pours off their body in 80 degree temperatures. I had a sports jacket on and felt rather warm. Afterwards, we were invited to the most amazing Shabbos meal at this random family's house in the German Colony. Basically, since the Western Wall is the holies site in Judaism, Jews from all over the World come to pray here on Shabbat. Many of us are single or from out of town with no place to eat. This real mensche named Jeff Sidel always finds a place for me, and whoever else needs a dinner, after services. He's been doing this wonderful act of kindness now for many years. Everyone knows about him and his real generous work. We walked for about 30 minutes but were properly rewarded when we reached the family's home. None of us knew the family, but they turned out to have the most delicious Shabbos meal, with really moist salmon, delicious wine, spicy Chinese style chicken, and so many side dishes. For dessert, we were treated to 18 year old Scotch and yummy cakes over games of chess, poker, while schmoozing with other various guests. We met some really friendly and well connected people from all over J'lem and Israel that night. Needless to say, the neighborhood was very posh. I was very impressed and very much appreciative to this American-Israeli family who opened up their home to me and several other strangers.
Well, I now have the travel bug and party vibe, but it's back to studying. We have a lot of hard work ahead of exams before Peasch (Passover holiday in 3 more weeks), and I feel my Hebrew progressing. There are certain things I feel comfortable speaking about in Hebrew. Sometimes I can hold an entire 20 minutes conversation with a few mistakes, while other times I need to ask for help or have a hard time finding the right words. On Shabbos afternoon, a few of us were invited to a mutual friend's flat for lunch. Many of the guests were Israeli so I was forced to talk (or try at least) to chat in Hebrew. The more I force myself and make mistakes, the more comfortable I become and the more I learn through social situations. I learn the material in class, try it out on the streets, make mistakes, and eventually mix the right words/phrases and grammar in through social interactions with Israelis.
Well I'd like to wish Chag Samech to all my Jewish friends and a Happy Easter to all my Christian friends back home. Friday was Good Friday, and during Shabbat services at the Kotel (Western Wall), thousands of Christian Pilgrims were in town to walk down Via Dolorosa to re-enact the Stations of the Cross. It's nice to see all three religions acting well towards each other for a change. It's been calm around here lately; I hope is stays that way.
So, please keep me informed of what's going on in all of your lives! I want to know who's pregnant, engaged, getting a divorce, G-d forbid dead, graduating, or enjoying a vacation/ mile-stone in their life. JUST BECAUSE I'M A STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND DOESN'T MEAN MY LOYAL FRIENDS, FAMILY, AND SEEDY ONLINE READERS HAVE TO BE. Please feel free to email me at Mountdew2891@aol.com
L'hitarot,
David
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
The bitch just wont die
As I wait for my delicious kosher Burger Barn hamburger to be delivered, I will entertain you, my reading audience, about several observations I have made recently about life in Israel and the United States.
Over the weekend, I spent a beautiful Shabbat in Haifa, a city in the North of Israel. Now, I haven't been in Haifa for almost 3 years, and it the city was just as amazing as I last remembered. Situated right on the cost, Haifa's majestic hills overlook most of the Golan and Galilee. I spent Shabbat with friends and various other acquaintances, many of them soldiers or soon to be soldiers. We sat around, schmoozed, ate, and relaxed. Now let me just start by saying that these fine young men and women are the backbone of Israeli society. Upon the completion of high school, they give 2-3 years, and sometimes even more, of their lives for the sake of Israeli security and defense. For most, it's not even an issue, although many wish they didn't have to serve, it's part of the national psyche that matures young adults and makes Israelis Israeli. I don’t have to educate my reading public on why there is a mandatory draft every year for all healthy, able minded and bodied 18 year olds. The World around us is a scary place. If we didn’t defend ourselves, who would? As long as Israel is surrounded by potential enemies (Lebanon, Syria, Iran, Hezbollah, Hamas, and Fattah), there will always be a call for an annual draft.
It's important to also consider what the army does for young Israelis; in short, conscription matures children into adults. I meet Israelis my age all the time, who don’t seem 23 or 25. They fool me for much older. Now, not all of these soldiers are battle scared veterans fresh form the front lines. Many had respectable desk jobs. It's not just bullets and landmines. Sadly, for Israelis the last 60 years have been met with 6 wars, 2 Entifadas, and countless counter-terrorism operations, all which offer constant reminders of who we are and what we need to be: a civilian army on call at all times. Although the army is first and foremost an army, it's the best socio-economic equalizer in Israel. On induction day, nobody cares if you're Sephardic (a Jew of Spanish origins), Ashkenazi (a Jew of Eastern European origins), poor, rich, a Sabra (native born Israeli),or oleh (immigrant to Israel). After the army service, many Israelis travel the world, India, Europe, the United States, and relax for awhile before entering the university. Throughout the years, men, and sometimes women, are called up for reserve duty exercises, which are like a high school reunion where they reconnect with friends from years ago. I see it all the time. In my wonderings around Jerusalem, I come across old friends running up to embrace each other months, and years after their service ended. For Israelis, the soldiers you meet in the army are your life-long friends. When you interview for a job, the 3rd question by an employer is ALWAYS, "What unit did you serve in?" If you didn’t dedicate at least some part of your life, towards the armed services, you better dam well have a good explanation. For better of for worse, but definitely not by Israeli design, the army has shaped Israel and Israelis. It's stitched into the fabric of this Jewish country's identity. The only real question is how this does, if it does at all, affect me???
In other news, apparently Hillary Clinton won big last night to remain alive for another day of fighting in the Democratic Primary. I was surprised, hell shocked that Mr. Hussein didn’t finish her off, once and for all. Not that I don’t like Clinton, I actually voted for her before I left, but she hasn’t done very well lately, Many, including myself, figured her campaign was dead in the water. I guess the bitch just wont die. I'd call her the comeback kid, but her husband already received that title with all the coming he did on the campaign trail back in 92. Regardless, the Democratic Party better get their ass in gear and soon because half the party supports Obama, half supports Clinton, and together I don’t think they could beat grandpa McCain right now.
Over the weekend, I spent a beautiful Shabbat in Haifa, a city in the North of Israel. Now, I haven't been in Haifa for almost 3 years, and it the city was just as amazing as I last remembered. Situated right on the cost, Haifa's majestic hills overlook most of the Golan and Galilee. I spent Shabbat with friends and various other acquaintances, many of them soldiers or soon to be soldiers. We sat around, schmoozed, ate, and relaxed. Now let me just start by saying that these fine young men and women are the backbone of Israeli society. Upon the completion of high school, they give 2-3 years, and sometimes even more, of their lives for the sake of Israeli security and defense. For most, it's not even an issue, although many wish they didn't have to serve, it's part of the national psyche that matures young adults and makes Israelis Israeli. I don’t have to educate my reading public on why there is a mandatory draft every year for all healthy, able minded and bodied 18 year olds. The World around us is a scary place. If we didn’t defend ourselves, who would? As long as Israel is surrounded by potential enemies (Lebanon, Syria, Iran, Hezbollah, Hamas, and Fattah), there will always be a call for an annual draft.
It's important to also consider what the army does for young Israelis; in short, conscription matures children into adults. I meet Israelis my age all the time, who don’t seem 23 or 25. They fool me for much older. Now, not all of these soldiers are battle scared veterans fresh form the front lines. Many had respectable desk jobs. It's not just bullets and landmines. Sadly, for Israelis the last 60 years have been met with 6 wars, 2 Entifadas, and countless counter-terrorism operations, all which offer constant reminders of who we are and what we need to be: a civilian army on call at all times. Although the army is first and foremost an army, it's the best socio-economic equalizer in Israel. On induction day, nobody cares if you're Sephardic (a Jew of Spanish origins), Ashkenazi (a Jew of Eastern European origins), poor, rich, a Sabra (native born Israeli),or oleh (immigrant to Israel). After the army service, many Israelis travel the world, India, Europe, the United States, and relax for awhile before entering the university. Throughout the years, men, and sometimes women, are called up for reserve duty exercises, which are like a high school reunion where they reconnect with friends from years ago. I see it all the time. In my wonderings around Jerusalem, I come across old friends running up to embrace each other months, and years after their service ended. For Israelis, the soldiers you meet in the army are your life-long friends. When you interview for a job, the 3rd question by an employer is ALWAYS, "What unit did you serve in?" If you didn’t dedicate at least some part of your life, towards the armed services, you better dam well have a good explanation. For better of for worse, but definitely not by Israeli design, the army has shaped Israel and Israelis. It's stitched into the fabric of this Jewish country's identity. The only real question is how this does, if it does at all, affect me???
In other news, apparently Hillary Clinton won big last night to remain alive for another day of fighting in the Democratic Primary. I was surprised, hell shocked that Mr. Hussein didn’t finish her off, once and for all. Not that I don’t like Clinton, I actually voted for her before I left, but she hasn’t done very well lately, Many, including myself, figured her campaign was dead in the water. I guess the bitch just wont die. I'd call her the comeback kid, but her husband already received that title with all the coming he did on the campaign trail back in 92. Regardless, the Democratic Party better get their ass in gear and soon because half the party supports Obama, half supports Clinton, and together I don’t think they could beat grandpa McCain right now.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Footloose and Fancy Free with Sushi!
Well, welcome to another Yom Reshion (Sunday, or literally first day). Classes were fine today. I keep plugging away on the future and past tense. I have resolved myself to begin a flash card collection or every word and every verb I learn; it could be interesting. After lunch, various spokesmen and women visited the ulpan to discuss the exciting volunteer options in the community. I decided to help make Mishloach Manot (food baskets) during Purim http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purim for needy families.
The last 2 weeks have had some particular points of interest worth noting. Last Thursday, I had my first Valentine's Day outside of the U.S. since I studied in France. Well, those who can love do, and those who can't speed date. My friend from the Merkez ( a quasi Jewish absorption center) begged me to join her speed dating event since I was A) American and B) a male, I fit the necessary requirements. Apparently there were a lot of American women in attendance and not very many men had signed up. I wasn't promised anything except all the wine I could drink. It's a good thing there was wine because it was the longest 1.5 hours of my life. Although I'm no super model, I must have met every over-weight Orthodox girl Jerusalem had to offer. I found the entire evening rather amusing. I wonder why Jews participate in speeding or other dating services like J-Date in Israel? I mean I have enjoyed some marginal success off of J-date, but that was back in the United State of Goyim. How does one have trouble finding nice young, old, men, women, gay, straight, single, Jews here? It's friggin Israel. That's like trying to find a Knick's fan at Madison Square Garden; it shouldn't be very difficult. Although the Knick's suck this year, so maybe in retrospect it would be difficult, but you understand my point. The entire country is crawling with Jews. You can't walk to the supermarket without accidentally tripping over a minyan (10 adult male Jews).
Shabbat was the usual calm 25 hours at Ulpan Etzion. I have noticed a few interesting and annoying tendencies among my ulpan students during Shabbat. Every Friday night and Saturday morning we make Kiddush (we bless the Sabbath's holiness over a cup of wine). Traditionally, you're not supposed to eat until Kiddush (the blessing over the wine) and Hamotzi (the blessing over the Challhot/ 2 loaves of bread) have been made. Now, I don’t get too angry at those who don’t know any better. Some of us are ethnically Jewish while others of us are more religiously Jewish. It's important to remember that Judaism doesn’t make a distinction between those ethnically Jewish by blood, those who converted, those who are outwardly observant and those who have never been to a synagogue before in their lives; in short a Jew is a Jew regardless of their personal story. However, I do become upset when there are people who dam well know you dont eat before kiddush and hamotzi have been made, and they sit down and eat right in front as to say, " I dont give a shit about your stupid traditions." Well moron, they're your traditions too, and you can feel free to honor them anytime you understand and respect our faith well enough. This leads me to discuss what Israel is and what Judaism means to me, but I'll spare you that rant for another time.
Last week it snowed on Wed, and unlike last month's blizzard, we only had classes delayed until 11AM when only 7 students showed up to class. On Tuesday, I would have made my emma (mother) very happy when I finally had my hair cut. Now in Israel, just as the U.S., I only carry credit card on me. Even before a single strain of hair was cut off of my head, I reached for my credit card and the stylist politely informed that I could easily pay tomorrow since the machine was down. Where in the world can you pay for a hair cut the day after?? Later that evening, Gersand and I went out for the most delicious sushi dinner you could imagine. It was a pleasant change in our diets as we are used to the prison food at Ulpan Etzion. I lost count of how many maki rolls I ate.
On Wed, we saw a movie titled Hesder which describes the trials and tribulations of a religious unit in the army. Most soliders, like most Israelis, are secular and Judaism is just a distant after thought for them. Religious young men receive deferments or flat out exemptions from serving due to their observant status. Instead of serving the usual mandatory 2 1/2 years, they attend yeshivot (religious academies). Some brave and well-rounded individuals chose to balance their religious studies with military obligation even though it's not necessary. I must say that I admire their personal obligation to country with their individual need to learn more about G-d.
Last Thursday, several Ulpan Etzion students, including myself, attended the annual Jerusalem Winter Ball. We dressed up, ate well, drank a ton, and danced the night away all to benefit homeless teenagers. I took Gemma, my darling Londoner, as my date, and we had the absolute time of our lives. I was a bit of a dancing machine, and anyone who knows how I act at weddings, proms, Bar Mitzvahs, or Dancing with the Star's tryouts is well aware of my swing, hip-hop, and Charleston moves. Needless to say, I can cut a rug in a tight situation. I met a lot of interesting individuals; there were many dati (religious) couples and singles. My favorite awkward situation of the night was seeing this one rather young, attractive, woman bumping and grinding like her sluty life depended on it out on the dance floor. I started dancing with her, and as I grabbed her hand, in a polite non-threatening manner, she screamed that she was shomer nagia (doesn’t touch members of the opposite sex). Well, it's hard to believe that the way she was dressed in her hot, low cut number and screw me heals. Regardless, the food was delicious, the drinks filled with alcohol, and the music didn’t stop until they kicked us out close to 4 AM. I haven't had that much fun since my sister's wedding. Shear madness!!
On Friday, I recovered from the Winter Ball and finally met my adopted Shabbat family for dinner. Matt, originally from LA is a massage therapist and his wife, Lewly is a lovely stay at home mother, originally from Buenos Aires, Argentina. Remember, half of Israelis are from somewhere else in the World. Together, they have two of the cutest little girls, one 2 months old, and the other is 2 year old. The mother speaks, Spanish, Hebrew, and English to the oldest, and the litttle chica understands all three languages so well. I was jealous.
So it's been awhile friends and family. I've been in Israel almost 2 months now, and I'm starting to really feel at home here. Don’t you be strangers! Email me with all your lovely words. Attached below is my brand new Facebook link: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=506951945 where you can see some pictures of me studying. If you scroll down to posted items, you can see the J-Ball pictures as well.
Shavua tov (Have a great week)
David
The last 2 weeks have had some particular points of interest worth noting. Last Thursday, I had my first Valentine's Day outside of the U.S. since I studied in France. Well, those who can love do, and those who can't speed date. My friend from the Merkez ( a quasi Jewish absorption center) begged me to join her speed dating event since I was A) American and B) a male, I fit the necessary requirements. Apparently there were a lot of American women in attendance and not very many men had signed up. I wasn't promised anything except all the wine I could drink. It's a good thing there was wine because it was the longest 1.5 hours of my life. Although I'm no super model, I must have met every over-weight Orthodox girl Jerusalem had to offer. I found the entire evening rather amusing. I wonder why Jews participate in speeding or other dating services like J-Date in Israel? I mean I have enjoyed some marginal success off of J-date, but that was back in the United State of Goyim. How does one have trouble finding nice young, old, men, women, gay, straight, single, Jews here? It's friggin Israel. That's like trying to find a Knick's fan at Madison Square Garden; it shouldn't be very difficult. Although the Knick's suck this year, so maybe in retrospect it would be difficult, but you understand my point. The entire country is crawling with Jews. You can't walk to the supermarket without accidentally tripping over a minyan (10 adult male Jews).
Shabbat was the usual calm 25 hours at Ulpan Etzion. I have noticed a few interesting and annoying tendencies among my ulpan students during Shabbat. Every Friday night and Saturday morning we make Kiddush (we bless the Sabbath's holiness over a cup of wine). Traditionally, you're not supposed to eat until Kiddush (the blessing over the wine) and Hamotzi (the blessing over the Challhot/ 2 loaves of bread) have been made. Now, I don’t get too angry at those who don’t know any better. Some of us are ethnically Jewish while others of us are more religiously Jewish. It's important to remember that Judaism doesn’t make a distinction between those ethnically Jewish by blood, those who converted, those who are outwardly observant and those who have never been to a synagogue before in their lives; in short a Jew is a Jew regardless of their personal story. However, I do become upset when there are people who dam well know you dont eat before kiddush and hamotzi have been made, and they sit down and eat right in front as to say, " I dont give a shit about your stupid traditions." Well moron, they're your traditions too, and you can feel free to honor them anytime you understand and respect our faith well enough. This leads me to discuss what Israel is and what Judaism means to me, but I'll spare you that rant for another time.
Last week it snowed on Wed, and unlike last month's blizzard, we only had classes delayed until 11AM when only 7 students showed up to class. On Tuesday, I would have made my emma (mother) very happy when I finally had my hair cut. Now in Israel, just as the U.S., I only carry credit card on me. Even before a single strain of hair was cut off of my head, I reached for my credit card and the stylist politely informed that I could easily pay tomorrow since the machine was down. Where in the world can you pay for a hair cut the day after?? Later that evening, Gersand and I went out for the most delicious sushi dinner you could imagine. It was a pleasant change in our diets as we are used to the prison food at Ulpan Etzion. I lost count of how many maki rolls I ate.
On Wed, we saw a movie titled Hesder which describes the trials and tribulations of a religious unit in the army. Most soliders, like most Israelis, are secular and Judaism is just a distant after thought for them. Religious young men receive deferments or flat out exemptions from serving due to their observant status. Instead of serving the usual mandatory 2 1/2 years, they attend yeshivot (religious academies). Some brave and well-rounded individuals chose to balance their religious studies with military obligation even though it's not necessary. I must say that I admire their personal obligation to country with their individual need to learn more about G-d.
Last Thursday, several Ulpan Etzion students, including myself, attended the annual Jerusalem Winter Ball. We dressed up, ate well, drank a ton, and danced the night away all to benefit homeless teenagers. I took Gemma, my darling Londoner, as my date, and we had the absolute time of our lives. I was a bit of a dancing machine, and anyone who knows how I act at weddings, proms, Bar Mitzvahs, or Dancing with the Star's tryouts is well aware of my swing, hip-hop, and Charleston moves. Needless to say, I can cut a rug in a tight situation. I met a lot of interesting individuals; there were many dati (religious) couples and singles. My favorite awkward situation of the night was seeing this one rather young, attractive, woman bumping and grinding like her sluty life depended on it out on the dance floor. I started dancing with her, and as I grabbed her hand, in a polite non-threatening manner, she screamed that she was shomer nagia (doesn’t touch members of the opposite sex). Well, it's hard to believe that the way she was dressed in her hot, low cut number and screw me heals. Regardless, the food was delicious, the drinks filled with alcohol, and the music didn’t stop until they kicked us out close to 4 AM. I haven't had that much fun since my sister's wedding. Shear madness!!
On Friday, I recovered from the Winter Ball and finally met my adopted Shabbat family for dinner. Matt, originally from LA is a massage therapist and his wife, Lewly is a lovely stay at home mother, originally from Buenos Aires, Argentina. Remember, half of Israelis are from somewhere else in the World. Together, they have two of the cutest little girls, one 2 months old, and the other is 2 year old. The mother speaks, Spanish, Hebrew, and English to the oldest, and the litttle chica understands all three languages so well. I was jealous.
So it's been awhile friends and family. I've been in Israel almost 2 months now, and I'm starting to really feel at home here. Don’t you be strangers! Email me with all your lovely words. Attached below is my brand new Facebook link: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=506951945 where you can see some pictures of me studying. If you scroll down to posted items, you can see the J-Ball pictures as well.
Shavua tov (Have a great week)
David
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Motsei Shabbat Blues and Pussy Galore
I am trying to sit down after supper for some work. There are so many pleasant distractions around here raging from football, taking a nap, reading a book, socializing, and I suppose homework too. I've been trying to sit down all week and write, but one event after another has kept me busy. Yesterday I finally went to the canyon (mall) for some Hebrew literature books.
Earlier in the week, I was just so physically exhausted, and I couldn’t explain why. I didn’t receive much sleep last week and perhaps it finally caught up with me. I find that the week really drags after Shabbat. I feel a real spiritual drag when Shabbos ends on Saturday night. Perhaps I am so used to not having work or school on Sunday. The Israeli weekend hasn't caught up with me yet. It's great having all day Friday off, but I want my Sunday's back too!
So it's about time I write about the incredible feline problem Israel has. During the British occupation in between the World Wars, apparently Israel had a serious rodent problem. The English imported thousands of cats to address the issue, although we no longer have vermin, a few thousands cats have gradually multiplied into hundreds of thousands of loud, annoying, occasionally diseased, but often cute cats. As I sit here typing, the computer room has been infiltrated by the most beautiful yet annoying black cat. These cats cry and scream for hours especially when they're hungry or in heat. We could have used some serious public service announcement from good old Bob Barker in this part of the world because most Israelis just don’t care about the insane over breading of cats.
Last week we saw a film that concentrated on the 2000 Israeli pullout from Lebanon. The film focused on several Israel soldiers saga pertaining to the final days of our occupation in extreme southern Lebanon. For those of you who don’t know, Israel occupied southern Lebanon between 1982-2000 as a means to combat the PLO (Palestinian Liberation Organization) and then eventually against Hezbollah from using southern Lebanon as a launching pad for attacks into northern Israel. The movie shows how even the hardest of Israeli soldiers can question their mission and their country's objectives in the on-going war in international terrorism.
After the film one of our residents, (we'll call her Patty Peacenik) said, and I quote, "I want to go to Lebanon so that I may help the Lebanese people and create an open dialogue with Hezbollah." My chin almost dropped when I heard this. How fuckin stupid do you need to be and or want to be to visit Lebanon? Do you really want to be friends with terrorists who have publicly vowed to destroy the very state we have decided to stake our future on? How do you intend to arrive in Beirut with your Israeli passport or your American passport filled with Israeli stamps and visas? Last time I checked Israelis and even non-citizens who have Israelis stamps were forbidden entry into a half dozen of Arab/Muslim countries including Lebanon. Also, Israel has disallowed all of its citizens from entering the Hezbollah controlled and Syrian backed terrorist state. These bastards want me dead because I am an Israeli, Jew, American, supporter of Westernized culture, free trade and democracy. Patty Peace At All Costs wants to give back everything we have fought and died for over the last 60 years for a peace that still isn’t guaranteed. I’ll be dammed if I’m going to vote for relinquishing even one inch of land before those sons of bitches disarm, control their heathen savage animalistic behavior and curtail rocket attacks. I’m not just talking about Hezbollah but those crazy jihad lovers to the West, Gaza’s Palestinians. The 1960's ended a long time, and sadly the global fight against radical Islam started not that long ago. I am not interested in sitting down with criminals, passing the hash pipe, and singing Kumbaya. I don’t want to hug these less than civilized individuals, nor do I want to give them my children’s future land or sense of security. We all want peace but at what costs? Hezbollah doesn’t want peace, and they most certainly don’t want to recognize a Jewish Israel, not at least anytime soon. If we negotiate with mass murderers, we weaken this state. I don’t know when the Patty Peaceniks of the world will understand this, but I hope it’s before they give up everything that makes this state so amazing, so Jewish, so ours.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Misplace a cell phone, gain a friend
I must apologize for the lack of blog entries lately. Life here at good old Ulpan Etzion has been hectic. During one of our snowball fights, I think I lost my cell phone. I have since found it, but for anyone trying to reach me, all is well, and there is no need to worry. On Thursday, several of us went out to Izen (a loud, obnoxious bar) for the 3rd and final time. I can’t stand that place. Yes the music is fine, but the drinks are ridiculously expensive, there is no place to dance, every sweaty disgusting Israeli guy tries picking up on your girlfriends, and the walk back is too far. In short, Izen is where fun goes to die. I spent a very quiet and restful Shabbat at the ulpan. Since a few of us are shomer-Shabbos ( we don’t do any form of work) there aren’t always a lot of activities for us. We played UNO (yes that annoying juvenile card game with the numbers and colors) for about 3 hours on Friday night. We just chatted and made fun of each other’s countries: England, France, and the United States.
Saturday night was an interesting night. Samuel, the other Boston guy, left his cartise (credit card) at Izen on Thursday night and we returned trying to hopefully find the card. We stayed for a drink, and one drink turned into 3 which become 7 and so forth. I found it odd that so many Israelis go out on Saturday night when they have to work in the morning. Samuel and I spoke some Hebrew. We had a nice, chill, no drama evening trying to pick up Israeli women.
On Monday, I battled the ulpan bitch, who shall remain nameless. Apparently I had yet to pay Ulpan Etzion’s rent fee. Life is crazy busy here. All the banks and businesses were closed during the great blizzard last week, and I don’t always have time to stop what I’m doing. Needless to say, I didn’t appreciate her tactless, Israeli way of communication, and I told her to kindly tone down her rhetoric. I spent most of Monday running around, trying to finalize my payment. I even left class 20 minutes early and arrived at lunch late. After she received my payment, we all kissed and made up. I refuse to be treated differently because I am an oleh chadash. Israelis wouldn’t dare expect other Israeli to run around like a fool. You’ll receive the money when I have the money and that’s only after my heater and toilet are working well and the food tastes better. Life is funny over here. There are 2 systems to live by: the official system which is supposed to be followed and the defacto, social system which trumps anything in writing. Nothing is finalized or edged in stone. One official from the governmental, bank, army, ulpan, or whatever agency might say one thing, and then tomorrow a different person says something completely different. Both aren’t true and sometimes both are correct. Who do you believe? Well, you learn to sift through the bullshit. Sometimes what’s in writing is golden while some other rules, laws, fees, or policies are negotiable. It makes for a complicated but never dull existence.
Hebrew classes are going very well this week. I am focused, as always, on learning verbs and slowly increasing my vocabulary. I have seen a slight but noticeable improvement in knowledge and even pronunciation. I really love most of the people here. I am distant from only a few groups: the Russians, external students (who study here but live outside the area), and Israelis who don’t live here at all. I feel as though I need to adventure out of the ulpan towards the city center more where I can speak more Hebrew with Israelis and explore all that the city has to offer.
The following is a true, but slightly non-kosher story.
Now, as previously noted, Ulpan Etzion is a very eclectic Hebrew learning institution where students from all backgrounds gather to absorb and assimilate into Israel society. I am about to sound like a complete snobbish, elitist asshole, but I have noticed that many people hale from slightly hmm less civilized societies where many Westernized customs don’t exist. Many residents here don’t understand proper dinning room etiquette (It’s never acceptable to ask for a glass of milk during a meat dinner, and on Shabbat!!) or washroom niceties. Case in point, the bathroom below us is disgusting. Several students haven’t been properly disposing of waste. I find urine on the toilet seats and fecal matter in the waste baskets all the time. I don’t have a clue who is doing this because apparently it’s a normal minhag (traditional custom) in Brazil, Russia, and Ethiopia. This needs to stop like yesterday. I never thought the day would occur when I needed to explain to grown men in 2008 that waste must be put into and flushed down the toilet. Most of us are civilized and rather cultural. I have met amazing individuals like Steven who was an optometrist in South Africa or Francisco who was a lawyer in Brazil. Recently I have begun talking to this really sweet French girl named Gersand who works with art.
I must just briefly express my appreciation but disappointment in the Super Bowl. Obviously, by now we all know that my beloved New England Patriots lost to the New York Giants. I was extremely impressed with the Giants defense. I think in the off-season we must invest in some younger, stronger, faster safeties, linebackers, nose-tackles, and cornerbacks. We didn’t play poorly but our defense let us done when we need it the most. Spring training is only 2 weeks away!!
Alright ladies and gents: Stay tuned because I have so much more I want to write about. I’ll try and post before Shabbat, but if not Shabbat Shalom.
David
Saturday night was an interesting night. Samuel, the other Boston guy, left his cartise (credit card) at Izen on Thursday night and we returned trying to hopefully find the card. We stayed for a drink, and one drink turned into 3 which become 7 and so forth. I found it odd that so many Israelis go out on Saturday night when they have to work in the morning. Samuel and I spoke some Hebrew. We had a nice, chill, no drama evening trying to pick up Israeli women.
On Monday, I battled the ulpan bitch, who shall remain nameless. Apparently I had yet to pay Ulpan Etzion’s rent fee. Life is crazy busy here. All the banks and businesses were closed during the great blizzard last week, and I don’t always have time to stop what I’m doing. Needless to say, I didn’t appreciate her tactless, Israeli way of communication, and I told her to kindly tone down her rhetoric. I spent most of Monday running around, trying to finalize my payment. I even left class 20 minutes early and arrived at lunch late. After she received my payment, we all kissed and made up. I refuse to be treated differently because I am an oleh chadash. Israelis wouldn’t dare expect other Israeli to run around like a fool. You’ll receive the money when I have the money and that’s only after my heater and toilet are working well and the food tastes better. Life is funny over here. There are 2 systems to live by: the official system which is supposed to be followed and the defacto, social system which trumps anything in writing. Nothing is finalized or edged in stone. One official from the governmental, bank, army, ulpan, or whatever agency might say one thing, and then tomorrow a different person says something completely different. Both aren’t true and sometimes both are correct. Who do you believe? Well, you learn to sift through the bullshit. Sometimes what’s in writing is golden while some other rules, laws, fees, or policies are negotiable. It makes for a complicated but never dull existence.
Hebrew classes are going very well this week. I am focused, as always, on learning verbs and slowly increasing my vocabulary. I have seen a slight but noticeable improvement in knowledge and even pronunciation. I really love most of the people here. I am distant from only a few groups: the Russians, external students (who study here but live outside the area), and Israelis who don’t live here at all. I feel as though I need to adventure out of the ulpan towards the city center more where I can speak more Hebrew with Israelis and explore all that the city has to offer.
The following is a true, but slightly non-kosher story.
Now, as previously noted, Ulpan Etzion is a very eclectic Hebrew learning institution where students from all backgrounds gather to absorb and assimilate into Israel society. I am about to sound like a complete snobbish, elitist asshole, but I have noticed that many people hale from slightly hmm less civilized societies where many Westernized customs don’t exist. Many residents here don’t understand proper dinning room etiquette (It’s never acceptable to ask for a glass of milk during a meat dinner, and on Shabbat!!) or washroom niceties. Case in point, the bathroom below us is disgusting. Several students haven’t been properly disposing of waste. I find urine on the toilet seats and fecal matter in the waste baskets all the time. I don’t have a clue who is doing this because apparently it’s a normal minhag (traditional custom) in Brazil, Russia, and Ethiopia. This needs to stop like yesterday. I never thought the day would occur when I needed to explain to grown men in 2008 that waste must be put into and flushed down the toilet. Most of us are civilized and rather cultural. I have met amazing individuals like Steven who was an optometrist in South Africa or Francisco who was a lawyer in Brazil. Recently I have begun talking to this really sweet French girl named Gersand who works with art.
I must just briefly express my appreciation but disappointment in the Super Bowl. Obviously, by now we all know that my beloved New England Patriots lost to the New York Giants. I was extremely impressed with the Giants defense. I think in the off-season we must invest in some younger, stronger, faster safeties, linebackers, nose-tackles, and cornerbacks. We didn’t play poorly but our defense let us done when we need it the most. Spring training is only 2 weeks away!!
Alright ladies and gents: Stay tuned because I have so much more I want to write about. I’ll try and post before Shabbat, but if not Shabbat Shalom.
David
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